I like the idea. I especially like the fact that you wrote "tempter tantrums". Especially in conjunction with the Green Bean Magic Tricks.

Oh, lord. So I did. I'll fix that now. Thanks.

ooooh, am I the first hippo? That doesn't sound like a sentence one should say with glee, but anyway...

This really sounds like a great project. I'm going to be launching a local moms' site sometime in the next month or so (Fingers crossed. Darn setbacks!) and we have some similar goals but your project is on a much larger scale than mine.

With regards to the forums, you may want to check out the policies and whatnot at chicklit.com, and maybe emailing Deborah (site owner). I'm one of the moderators over there and crap is kept to a minimum.

I'd be happy to give you a hand with site content (whatever sort of help you need). Email me and we can chat.

I think it's a really great idea. I don't know how much value my input would have, other than than perhaps an occasional column from the periphery (the non-mother friend of all the mothers)? I don't know. I don't know what moms want, but I too have seen the implosions of many a community. I think the divisions by geography are good, as well as even subsets, possibly? (east coast, west coast, plains) or subsets of politics? AP can be red or blue, or any other political stripe...

So, I dunno, just throwing things out there.

Well, damn, I was hoping for some magic bean tricks.

Anyway, I'm wondering if you would allow discussion on abortion. I know a lot of mothering groups that strictly prohibit even mentioning the a-word because it's so divisive. To me, it's a central issue to mother's rights, but I can see how it might just cause a lot of on-line yelling and name calling.

I think this sounds like a great idea. I get so sick of reading message board that just get way too hung up on rightness or wrongness of specific parenting methods than dealing with the actual experience of motherhood.

I would love to be a part of this community!

Alas the idea is sprouting and of course you know I'm all in for whatever. Awesome idea and looking forward to content!

Chris: Almost! And re: your project--maybe we could share links? Let me know. And thanks for the suggestions.

Casey, yes. Good idea.

R2K, Traci and Rachel: Thank you!

Six comments down, 14 to go.

great idea Andrea. if I can help in anyway let me know.

Andrea, I think this sounds like a wonderful idea. I wish I had been in touch with other moms in this way when my children were younger, in particular, as I dealt with miscarriage, prenatal diagnosis, divorce, so many things that seem to isolate us from our IRL friends because they feel either foreign or threatening. Online you are sure to find someone who will understand your situation, whatever it may be. If you are looking for contributions from a mom of older (10 and up) children, please let me know.

andrea -- at last it is coming soon! hoorah!
just glad about the canadian thing...
but some things should be available to both?
i enjoy talking to people from everywhere.
sorry for confusing post....nak

Jenn--thanks!

Songbird--absolutely. Anyone from "I'm having a hard time getting knocked up" to "Oh my god, I can't believe it, my grandkids are getting married." And in between.

Marianne--thanks. :) And most of it will be available to both. No worries there.

NIne comments down. Eleven to go.

I'm in too...whatever support/help you need. :D

Happy to help out (once we are post babymoon of course!). Love to contribute, happy to promote you on T.O. Mama. Whatever I can do!

Cheers

Jen

Um, where do I sign up?

I have never found an online community I really felt like I belong in. I would LOVE to be a part of your community. Any help with content or moderation you need, just ask.

Well, this puts us at 11 comments here and three helpful emails--so hey, if we get another 6-9 comments overnight, I can post all the Frances stuff I've been keeping bottled up before I explode.

Jen--I'd love to share links when we get up and running. Thanks.

Kateri: Thanks to you too.

Tanya: Hmmm. I THOUGHT SO.

Wow! You get to be even more prolific!
Great idea, long overdue in today's world. Get it? Over-due?!

I'll make room in my life for it.

I was going to say that my concern would be getting enough commenters/content. But your post has not been up long and already -- !

Are you going to do guest columns, or just have a message board? Personally I would like to read guest columns because they're meatier. I am imagining something like the "Mothers Who Think" section that used to be on Salon.com. I loved that even before I was a mother. (I just checked and they are still online but it's a lot different than it was. It used to be issues as seen through a mother's lens, which was wonderful.)

How will The Whole Mom be different from Literary Mama?

I understand your comment about Americans overloading the internet, but I would hate to be restricted to American-only content and miss out on anything you fine Canadians have to say!

If you can get people outside North America that would be AWESOME. I don't know anything about parenting in other cultures. Or, actually, subcultures w/in North America.

I like the idea of "how the hell do you do it when you've got kids?" stories. I could get my neighbor to tell you all how she AND her husband trained for and competed in a marathon while both were raising 2 kids under 5 and working full time!! Then I would like to know how anyone gardens when your child eats every single green berry on the bush. For example.

I'll come back if I think of anything else.

I really hope this goes over well, as I think it would be an awesome resource for moms! I love working on this with you and it really isn't "work" for me. It's a break from the rest of my life and I cherish all the little breaks I get.

Anyway, I think it will be important to figure out how to "market" the site, meaning getting it out there to all the online moms who might be interested in it. I'm sure that there will be friends, and people who visit your site but we'll also need to think about spreading the word a little - especially once we have some content to share. That's all I really can come up with to add to what others have mentioned here.

I'm going to bed now - G'night!

Oh, Andrea, I'm so excited about this!

I am put off by the parenting magazines already, and I don't even have kids yet.

I think one of my favorite things about your blog is that you do a great job of addressing what it is to parent a child who is different, and to be a parent who is different in some way. I would love to read about:
- explaining diseases (genetic or otherwise) to children
- how different parents handle religion or lack thereof with their kids
- how different families have handled issues between themselves and their parents when it comes to their kids; I think that flawed parents can be great grandparents, but I know this must be tough for the parents, and I find the whole issue fascinating
- education; how do parents choose how to eduate their children? How do they work within the framework of public, private, or homeschooling in order to try to ensure that the values they want their kids to have are not corrupted at school? Is it possible to send your child to a public school and still be concerned about them picking up on the "isms"? What about a religious private school for parents who are atheists?

I'll stop for now, but rest assured I'll be begging for more content as it comes to mind!

I'd like to see articles or discussions on birth experiences/breast feeding experiences and how they differed from expectations.

Count me in!

As far as anything constructive --- the best online communities I've been a part of have been the ones that were really heavily moderated to remove trolls QUICKLY. I would definitely recommend that.

Count me in!!!! and I agree about the moderated....trolls love to stir up trouble.

WE have achieved twenty comments. Congratulations!

Of course, if you want to add more, please feel free to. I'm not closing it. But now I can talk about something else, if I want to.

Jennifer: Yes, columns, articles and reviews, not just the message board. Different from Literary Mama b/c it's not just about litarature and mothering--but about everything. You could write an article or column about, I don't know, taking the subway. And not even taking the subway with your kids, but just taking the subway--the idea being that it's a different experience when you're a mom, maybe because you see another new mom on the train and it brings back memories, or you see a person who reminds you of your child, or whatever.

The board wouldnt' be segregated. The American/Canadian/Other sections are in addition to the other ones.

Kim--you are awesome. And yes, marketing is a biggie. I have a few ideas--but we can talk about that when we're a bit closer to the grand opening, maybe?

Abbey & Liz--thank you. I'll keep those topics handy.

Victoria & Tara Marie--I totally agree.

Thanks everyone. :) I knew I could count on the hippos.

this does sound like a great idea!

Of course, my internet-ing is about to seriously decrease once I have to start teaching next fall. So I may well miss the grand opening. However, I'm all free in the winter/spring, so I'll look forward to updates.

I love the idea of writing about ordinary things which are now different because one has become a parent. (Not just a mother -- right?) I'm trying to think of an example from my own life... OK. The other day I read a post from a guy in Portland, OR who was dissing the Rose Festival; when I lived there as a single and then newly-married woman, I dissed the Rose Festival too; but when I read his post I thought, what a snob! Go watch a parade with a 3-year-old. There is nothing finer in the world.

Anyway. Go, Andrea! Let me know if you need help.

You KNOW I will be here to support you in whatever way I can. I'm glad to be one of your hippos.....:0)

MWAH!!!

Hi Andrea,

Just stumbled onto your blog via Google. (Hope you don't mind a dad commenting.) I've been enjoying your writings about the ultrasound issues during your pregnancy. On an intellectual level I understand everything you've written about the statistics of all this. But, as you know, it can play emotional havoc.

My wife is expecting our fifth child. She's 46. The last couple of ultrasounds have shown that the baby's femur is shorter than normal. (62mm at 35 weeks.) Obviously at this age our biggest concern has been DS. There are no other "soft markers" for DS. Our doctor's attitude is basically that there's a couple of weeks to go and you can't do anything about it anyway, so don't worry so much.

I appreciate your rantings about all this. It has helped calm me down. Any other advice?

Thanks.

Michael