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June 8, 2006 It's long and tortuous, but worth it, promise 
You know how when you first take a pregnancy test (I am not pregnant) and it goes pink or you get two lines (I repeat, I am not pregnant), first you are struck with that dizzying giddy blast of joy, and then you go around for maybe eight weeks alternately overjoyed at your good fortune and petrified to tell anyone, because if you do maybe you'll jinx it? Those of you who have not been and will not ever be pregnant may participate by sagely nodding. No one will call your bluff. Those of you who have know exactly what I'm talking about. "I have to tell my mother," you think, "and if I don't tell my best friend, she'll hate me. Everyone else has to wait until after the first trimester." Because if you told someone when you still had that scarily high chance of miscarriage, you just know you'll miscarry. So you're thrilled, and scared completely shitless. Yes? Yes. That's how I feel right now. And once again, I really mean it, I am not pregnant. But something really great happened today, and I am alternately overjoyed and scared shitless, because for sure if I mention it, I'll jinx it. So I'm not even going to tell you what happened exactly. Much like a woman who just found out she's pregnant and, instead of saying so, says "I got a positive pregnancy test" or "there were two lines!" I will not tell you my good news directly. Instead, I'll just say I got a letter today. I got a letter today! A very nice letter. Really, it is very nice. I'm sure there was a horrible mistake and the letter that was meant for me, the one that mocked my writing abilities and promised to circulate the cause of my humiliation to every editor in the english-speaking world, is out there somewhere, but it's not the one I got. And yes, the one I got does address me by name and reference the actual name of something I wrote, and it is from an editor, and it has highly complimentary words and includes a promise of payment of the princely sum of approximately $30. Still, I'm sure it was all a mistake, and somewhere out there the editor is smacking his forehead and saying, "Doh! I meant to send the acceptance letter to that other person, the one who can spell! Not her!" And he's writing me a new letter saying, "Sorry, I take it back, it was all a mistake." But in the meantime, I'm going to enjoy the letter I got. And even if the letter I got was not a horrible mistake, and was in fact meant for me and for my story (ack! jinx!), there is always the possibility that the editor's business will burn to the ground and my poor, sad story will still never see the light of ... a few hundred cathode-ray screens, anyway, since it's an online publication. It's not likely to see daylight, unless someone prints it to take it outside or brings their laptop to the beach. You know. If it's not a hoax and if the editor's business doesn't burn down. But, in the unlikely event that it is both not a hoax and on a premises including working fire alarms--in December of 2006, I may (or may not) be an actual paid, published author of fiction. (Furiously knocking on wood and kicking underside of wooden desk with both feet.) If said event actually takes place, I will, of course, be requiring all of you to visit the website in question and shell out the $4 or whatever it is for your rights to download the online magazine (it's in pdf format) so you may laugh at my pretensions while telling me to my face how wonderful it is. Don't worry. I'm not demanding. As long as you read it, I'll be happy. You're free to hate it. But you do have to pay for it, because I only get one contributor's copy and it's mine, all mine. If it is printed. Or posted. Whatever. Which maybe it won't be. When I say that this is something I've wanted since I was five years old, I mean it, so you'll understand how petrified and giddy I am. It's been a long 26 years. And now it makes all the thousands of paperback novels, hardcover novels, magazines, writing magazines, writing books, short-story collections and little literary magazines I've purchased worthwhile. It's all paying off now! Thirty dollars, baby. Why, when I divide that by the forty hours minimum I spent writing and polishing it, I can see I've been paid at the enviable rate of seventy-five cents per hour. That's right. I'll be quitting my day job in no time. (You all understand that I am just giddy to be paid for something I've written, period, right? This is all in good fun.) I probably should have waited 24 hours so that my hormones would go back to normal and I could have composed an entry about it that would make sense, or something. But no. This is too exciting. In December, I--me--Andrea--may actually be a published author who is actually paid for what she wrote, and considering it was the first story I sent out since graduating university and the first market I sent it to, I feel pretty damned good about it, even if I am terrified that by mentioning it I have irrepairably fucked it up. I will be able to say that I've been published without referencing that time when a major metropolitan newspaper published my diary, and no I'm not making that up, but I'm also not going to provide proof because really, do I want to relive that experience? Not so much. *blinking* Yeah. So that's it, then. An acceptance letter. My first, my very first, precious beloved acceptance letter. Should I frame it, or have it bronzed? Posted by Andrea at June 8, 2006 7:21 AM under Me EMAIL this entry (comments fields are below this section) Comments wow...CONGRATS!! Wasn't that on your goal list for this year? :D I'd go for the bronzing. Just for fun. Posted by: Tanya at June 8, 2006 6:53 AM
Congrats Andrea! I'm so happy for you! Posted by: Kim at June 8, 2006 7:58 AM
yay! congratulations :) Posted by: lucy at June 8, 2006 8:02 AM
Wahoo!!!! I hope you have some left-over chocolate from Monday's brag-fest! This is certainly an accomplish worthly of expensive brag-fest chocolate! Congratulations and well-deserved. Yes, the letter was meant for you. Yes, this is just a stepping stone to realizing your dreams! Keep at it! Yes, bronze the letter! Wahoo!!!! Posted by: Miche at June 8, 2006 8:04 AM
I'd go for the bronzing, and I would mount it on the wall with special lighting and everything. But that's just me ;) Congratulations. I can't wait to read it. Posted by: Kateri at June 8, 2006 8:41 AM
Go, you! Congrats, Andrea! Posted by: Suzanne at June 8, 2006 8:50 AM
Thanks, everyone. :) The twelve hours since then have been pretty rough (for reasons I can't get into until at least next week) so this feels extra good right now. Miche, I foresee another Monday Mourning Blog Boast. :) A truly unbearable one. Posted by: Andrea at June 8, 2006 8:54 AM
Wahoooooooooo! That's great. Just wonderful. Sorry about the following rough 12 hours, but read through the letter again! Yay! You are becoming the writer you want to be. Posted by: Madeleine at June 8, 2006 9:13 AM
Congrats on selling your first freelance piece. What's it about and what publication is it in? Posted by: Lyrehca at June 8, 2006 9:22 AM
Congratulations to you! What exciting times! Yes, frame that acceptance letter! Posted by: Michelle at June 8, 2006 9:35 AM
Congratulations! That's fantastic! Posted by: Casey at June 8, 2006 9:48 AM
Congratulations! Posted by: parodie at June 8, 2006 9:49 AM
Great news, how exciting - congratulations! Posted by: nancy at June 8, 2006 9:59 AM
You guys are so awesome. Thank you. Lyrehca, it's a small Canadian online sci-fi magazine called Challenging Destiny. Website: http://www.challengingdestiny.com/ So it's a very small market, but on the other hand, it's paid (which isn't bad for a first fiction piece) and they publish decent work which seems to get a bit of recognition. You have no idea how hard I am fighting the impulse to downplay this. Even though I've wanted it for 26 years. Posted by: Andrea at June 8, 2006 10:10 AM
NO DOWNPLAYING! THIS IS FANTASTIC! Okay, I'll calm down now. The honest truth: I am stunned by this. Not stunned that you had something accepted, but stunned that this was the first time. You're an incredible writer, Andrea, and the world deserves to read much more of you. I for one will certainly pony up four bucks to read your story once it comes out. Posted by: art-sweet at June 8, 2006 10:18 AM
I'd say frame it, put it up on your wall. Oh first make dozens of copies of it and when and if you get turned down send that person a copy and say ha, well at least somepeople like my writing!! So Hooray for you!!! Posted by: LauraJ at June 8, 2006 10:53 AM
I'd say frame it, put it up on your wall. Oh first make dozens of copies of it and when and if you get turned down send that person a copy and say ha, well at least some people like my writing!! So Hooray for you!!! Posted by: LauraJ at June 8, 2006 10:54 AM
EXCELLENT! Congratulations! I can't wait to read it! And, thirty dollars is nothing to sneeze at!! Posted by: Sarah at June 8, 2006 11:08 AM
Yay! Posted by: uccellina at June 8, 2006 12:14 PM
and yes, I totally know that feeling! Congratulations, you should be so incredibly proud...I know I certainly am, and that is just pride FOR you, because I've always known you had what it takes to be paid for your writing. Your words are brilliant. Posted by: Carolyn at June 8, 2006 12:53 PM
Thanks again everyone! Art-sweet, thanks. Of course, The World can't be faulted when I've refused to submit anything for the past ten years. I'm still just absolutely gobsmacked that the first thing I sent out was accepted. I just don't think it's supposed to happen that way. Posted by: Andrea at June 8, 2006 1:07 PM
Awesome stuff!! Congratulations. If you bronze it, will you still be able to read it, though? I mean, anyone can bronze a piece of paper (I think. Can't you?) so maybe framing it in a nice frame and placing under some strategically placed track-lighting and then installing a big neon sign with an arrow over your house would be better. And totally inconspicuous. :D Posted by: julia at June 8, 2006 1:21 PM
That is fabulous news! A big congrats on the absolutely-not-a-mistake letter! Posted by: Meredith at June 8, 2006 1:25 PM
CONGRATULATIONS!!!! how exciting! I would totally frame that letter and place it prominantly near your writing space. What a wonderful achievement :) Posted by: suze at June 8, 2006 2:15 PM
Wooooohooooooo!!!! That is so totally wonderful! Posted by: liz at June 8, 2006 2:24 PM
Nice job, Andrea. Now you can send out other fiction pieces and your cover letters will say "I've been published in Challenging Destiny" and you can build up from there. Definitely keep an eye on retaining your reprint rights, for when you plan to publish an anthology of your work or resell it to bigger markets that might publish already-printed stuff. Posted by: Lyrehca at June 8, 2006 6:17 PM
Congrats and double congrats. Let us know when it goes live! Jen Posted by: Jen at June 8, 2006 6:18 PM
Woohoo... congratulations! Posted by: Eryn at June 8, 2006 8:02 PM
CONGRATS! Not surprised at all! You're an excellent writer. Let us know more deets as they come! Posted by: Katie at June 8, 2006 8:27 PM
Oh, a huge high-five to you! I've got my hand up ... ready for your return slap ... now! I'm not surprised at all, except for the surprise of wondering when you found time to do this (but I've mentioned that before). Congratulations, and definitely let us know when it is published so we can spread the word. I can't wait to read it. Posted by: moreena at June 8, 2006 9:56 PM
YOU. GO. Posted by: Kristina at June 9, 2006 2:57 AM
Brava, Andrea! I'm so proud of you!! Posted by: DaniGirl at June 9, 2006 8:00 AM
Good for you! Posted by: Marla Good at June 9, 2006 8:24 AM
Thanks again! (We really need more variety in English for ways to say "thank you" multiple times to the same people. I've run out.) Not only for all the congratulations--but also for breaking 30 comments for the first time. Posted by: Andrea at June 9, 2006 9:31 AM
Oh, wonderful! Must be a great feeling. Many congratulations. Posted by: Emmie at June 9, 2006 11:28 AM
Umm, on the article, not the comments. Ok, while we're at it, congratulations on that too. And on the cute little girl. And the great writing. There, that ought to have it covered for a while... Posted by: Emmie (Better Make It A Double) at June 9, 2006 11:31 AM
WAHOOO Congrats girlfriend! Posted by: Tanya at June 9, 2006 12:08 PM
Emmie--LOL. Thanks. Tanya, thanks! And I'll reply to your email soon. Posted by: Andrea at June 9, 2006 9:14 PM
hey! SO exciting! i'm tossing confetti around the room! Posted by: kyra at June 9, 2006 10:08 PM
Yay!!!!! I'm doing a happy dance for you!! Posted by: Sue at June 9, 2006 10:15 PM
Oh my god, now I've hit 40. (Yes, I realize that still makes me firmly a minor league player, but it's big for me.) Posted by: Andrea at June 9, 2006 11:16 PM
Whoah, Andrea, that's so WONDERFUL! I will clutch my $4 in my sweaty little palms in anticipation. I can't wait to read it! I'm so proud of you! Posted by: Abbey at June 10, 2006 2:58 PM
Yay!!! What wonderful news. I would feel exactly the same way. :-) Posted by: Margaret at June 10, 2006 5:54 PM
I just read this now - congratulations! Posted by: snafooey at June 12, 2006 9:03 AM
All the hippos go berserk! Respectful of all the wood knocking I will gaze off into the, at this point in time, starry sky and say under my breath "Congratulations!!" You can pretend I am talking to one of the constellations. Posted by: Gillian at September 29, 2006 12:10 AM
Go Berserk |
Change is God (Octavia Butler, Parable Series) "A person is a person through other persons." Zulu saying Email Frances! frances AT athenadreaming DOT org You can email her mother too (that's me):
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Earn Your Karmic Brownie Points The WHOYCBE Not So Secret Spoilers These links open in a new browser window. Random Writer's Quote I really don't know whether the people who don't like my writing don't like it because of their perception of me as a tough, not-nice woman. It seems kind of ridiculous--I think of myself as a completely ordinary, harmless person--but what people think of your writing persona is out of your hands. The narrator of my non-fiction pieces is not the same person I am--she is a lot more articulate and thinks of much cleverer things to say than I usually do. I can imagine her coming across as a little insufferable sometimes. But she, too, is out of my hands--I may have invented her, but she is the person who insists on speaking for me. ~ Janet Malcolm
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